How One Hour Can Change Your Life.... FOREVER!!!

In an effort to get more out of my day I've elected to start getting into the office early.  I now leave my house at 5:50am and hop on the 6:11am train down to the office (I used to take the 7:14am train).  I know it sounds brutal, but I love getting home at 5:00pm and feeling like I have an entire evening ahead of me.  I've also been able to be super productive at work and really put my head down to get some things done.  Not to mention the trains are less packed during my travel times!!!  After a week of getting used to the early start, I'm able to make it though the day without feeling like I'm about to nod off.

Well of course, it all can't be good.  I can deal with my 9:30 pm bedtime, ironing my clothes the night before work, and even showering at night rather than in the morning.  What I can't deal with is what I saw yesterday morning on my early walk to the train. The image has been burned into my head and haunts me every corner I turn.... Let me set the stage for you.

As I'm turning on Townsend apporaching 2nd street on my way to the Caltrain. I see something weird up ahead near the corner.  It looks like a man hiding behind one of those voltage/power boxes on the street.  See picture below.

So the guy would actually have been looking at the camera from this angle, but hiding behind the green box.  There is actually a great deal of cover around him.  A large building to the right, some bollards and trees to the left, but there isn't anything shielding the rear.  This is the angle that I approached from (see below):

So I'm thinking... it is windy out here... maybe he is just behind this thing to block the wind.  As I got closer I could see that dude was not hiding from the wind.  He was taking a shit on the damn sidewalk!!!!  His bare ass was out and he was copping a squat.  I actually witnessed a grown man defacating (something that I thought I'd never see in my life.... and never wanted to see).  I don't even think I'd want to watch myself drop a load let alone watch someone else do it.

Now part of me wanted to pull out the old trusty IPhone and send a photo straight to Facebook & Twitter, but I figured that would gross everyone out, and I guess the guy deserved a little privacy.  For some strange reason I thought he might get angry and fling some shit my way, so I passed on the photo opportunity.  Nonetheless, he had to know that his stealth shitting scheme had been thwarted, so when I walked by him I looked him in the eye.  This dude had the nerve to look at me like, "WHAT??!!?? You ain't never seen a grown man take a shit on the sidewalk before??" In his defense, he had put a tarp down so he wouldn't get the sidewalk messy.  I guess that's the least he could do.

So I continued on my voyage to the train with my stomach in a knot at this point.  Before I could cross the street, a woman jogged past me in his direction.  I couldn't think of any way to warn her, but I sure was interested in seeing her reaction.  So I turned around and watched as this woman went from a light jog to a full on sprint, looking back over her shoulder as if she had seen a ghost.  PURE COMEDY.

Just as I am, that woman is forever scorned.  Not much else to say on that story except EWWWWW!!!  I swear I couldn't make this stuff up.  I have now shared with you the nastiest thing that I've ever witnessed to this point.  I've seen a dead body... I was on a BART train where a guy threw up all over three other passengers.... I've even seen someone have a compound tib/fib fracture in a football game, and none of those compared to what I saw yesterday morning.  May none of you ever have the misfortune of witnessing that first hand.

So I had to get a bit creative on the mix for this one.  I auditioned a lot of songs for this mix.  Some of the ones that didn't make the cut: Devin the Dude - Boo Boo'n, Snoop - Drop It Like It's Hot, O.D.B. - Dog Shit

Nonetheless, I think the Mierda Mix tells the story very well.  I might have to go back to my regular work schedule if this is the type of stuff i'll be seeing early in the morning.